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as the saying goes:

"the depth of the water is silent, and the man is steady.

"

nowadays, people like to chat on Wechat and share their developments in moments.

therefore, if we want to know whether a person is really capable or bluffing, we can tell one or two from his circle of friends.

in ordinary life, people who like to send the following four kinds of dynamics often have no real ability.

overbrag about one's wealth

Meng Fei said frankly in the program:

"all superiority does not come from appearance, stature, knowledge, family, wealth, status, achievement and power, but from lack of insight and compassion."

it is often said that the more a person likes to show off, the less he lacks.

I think so.

when I know a friend, I can often see him showing off his wealth in the circle of friends.

he will post everything from how much the new watch costs to how much the fund earns every day.

I always thought he was at least an elite, and I envied his good life.

once, when I heard a mutual friend mention it, I knew that he was actually carrying loans from several platforms, and the phone calls urging him to repay the money every day could be exploded.

when I look back, I find that what my friends show off is really boring.

Wise people keep a low profile, fools keep a high profile.

in many cases, bragging too much about your wealth can only gain temporary satisfaction, and it may cost you some unnecessary price in the near future.

exaggerate the facts too much, even if others really believe it, but there is no impenetrable wall in the world, and the moment the facts are exposed, they will only become a laughingstock.

as Maugham said in the Moon and sixpence:

"what you have to overcome is your vanity, your desire to show off, and the cleverness you want to show off all the time."

those superficial desire to show off, and some unrealistic show-off, are really harmful.

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he who knows others is wise, and he who knows himself is wise.

only by keeping a low profile and not showing off can we win the respect of others.

if a person wants to keep up with others everywhere, such behavior can only show that he is incompetent and inferior to others.

trouble others again and again

I believe such a thing has happened to all of you:

can't you write an article? Can you write a promotional article for me when my new store opens?

aren't you a computer major? Is it convenient to upgrade my computer system?

do you have time right now? Would you please vote for me?

what are you doing? Can you cut a knife for me?

.

such people have an iconic mantra: "Please help me."

there was a classmate when I was at school, and we were on good terms.

after graduation, we have families and careers in different cities, so we are not very connected.

at first, I clicked on all the links he sent, thinking that it wouldn't take much time anyway.

Friends are used for trouble.

unexpectedly, he sent more and more links, ranging from kitchen detergents to free mobile phones or massage chairs.

unexpectedly, I clicked into his moments and found that I had been deleted by him.

years of friendship, I suddenly think it is a joke.

Dogs are not well fed and people are not well fed.

it seems that many people do not understand the true meaning of the phrase "it is duty not to help you, but not to help you".

they only think:

"this is a small favor. If you don't help me, it is impossible for God to tolerate it, but you just have no conscience."

Friends can trouble each other, but that doesn't mean they can have endless troubles.

if a person is always bothering others with nothing in return, it can only show that he has no ability, and that will only push the friend who is sincere to you further and further away.

show off your connections

there is an impressive character in the TV series Thirty:

Wang Manni's blind date Song Donghu.

when her mother introduced Song Donghu to her, she described Song Donghu:

A high-end person in finance, with an annual salary of one million yuan and a wide range of contacts, owns two properties in Shanghai and is a very reliable man.

however, when Wang Manni really came into contact with Song Donghu, he found that all this was an illusion created by him.

Song Donghu, dressed in a suit, took Wang Manni to a buffet. While showing off his "beautiful girlfriend" to others, he showed off all kinds of celebrities he knew to Wang.

the careful Wang Manni found that Song Donghu nominally wanted to take a picture with others, but in fact it was just to show off in moments.

from the various reactions of the caffeine, it is obvious that they do not know Song Donghu.

Wang Manni saw through the camouflage of Song Donghu and decisively blocked his Wechat after separation.

on the surface, knowing them is like your capital, which everyone admires, but in factThese so-called connections are like a mirage, only looking rather than useful.

in fact, networking is not about who you know, but who knows you when you need it.

there is a sentence in the book "minimalist Force":

"when you don't reach a higher level, connections are worthless. Remember, connections are not sought after, but attracted."

"

No one cares who you had dinner with, who you shook hands with, or who you took pictures with.

none of this matters.

instead of trying to maintain an illusory interpersonal relationship, it is better to manage yourself well.

people who have no skills will show off their contacts everywhere.

always complain about the misfortune of life

Mr. Lu Xun once said:

"as soon as a person starts complaining, things quickly move in the direction of his complaint."

"

I feel the same way.

I used to have a colleague who liked to complain:

work is really tiring, and I can't make any money. I feel that there is no light in my life.

I'm going to lose weight recently, but five kilometers a day is really hard. I want a little recipe for losing weight without exercising or dieting.

the price of takeout has gone up again. I can't afford to eat. When will the poor days come to an end?

.

it seems that nothing good in the world happens to happen to him.

but over time, when I saw that his moments were still complaining day after day, I hated him, too.

Carnegie, a famous American master of interpersonal relations, wrote this in his book "discovering potential you haven't taken advantage of."

"if everyone can turn complaints into well-intentioned communication, complaints into positive suggestions, and complaints into positive actions, they will be pleasantly surprised to find that a success is close at hand, and a new world without complaints."

if a person always complains about the misfortune of life, but does not see the light in life, it can only prove his incompetence.

complain that you get nothing but make your mood worse.

instead of complaining, accept it, accept what happened, and try to make a change.

▽

people often say: life is made by yourself, and happiness is sought by yourself.

in this world, people who are really capable tend to talk less and do more and never exaggerate and show off too much.

, may you not waste your time on those who are not worth it, and may we all cultivate our character and be gently waited for by the years.