Mo Yan wrote in the herbivorous Family:

"if people want to survive, they have to get rid of a series of shackles. Sadness and pessimism is man's most fundamental enemy."

if you think about it, it is true that when you live a lifetime, countless pains often come from inner worries.

think too much, can't let go, can't get through, can't get better.

over time, it will become endless internal friction, making you live in negative emotions every day, and you will feel tired even if you don't do anything.

as more and more rubbish is piled up in my heart, life is being overdrawn and exhausted.

it's like walking in the desert with heavy bags, unable to find water, tired and thirsty, and can fall down at any time.

if you want to get out of pain and live a happy life, the best way is to get rid of mental friction and cure your heart.

Today, I would like to share with you these seven good habits recommended by People's Daily to stop internal friction and learn to benefit from it for a lifetime.

01

Don't overestimate

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the lintel of the Delphi Temple in ancient Greece is engraved with a profound philosophy: "Man, know yourself."

the most important thing in life is to have self-knowledge and to be practical before you can travel light.

being a human being, being able to see the reality clearly, recognize yourself clearly, do your best to things, and devote yourself to others is a rare sobriety in the world.

Don't overestimate your ability and stand on a high platform as much as you can.

when you walk in the world, you should not only look up at the distant sky, but also look down at the road under your feet.

Don't overestimate your relationship with others. No one will stay with each other for a lifetime. Gathering and separation is the norm in life.

Don't pay too much attention to people coming and going, those who accompany you, thank them; those who accompany you all your life, thank God.

Don't overestimate the good and evil of human nature. While treating others sincerely, don't forget to save yourself.

misread a person, give the wrong heart, do not worry too much, remember to let go of yourself.

02

Don't procrastinate

I wonder if you have ever had such an experience:

I want to read a book, but I don't bother to open it when I put it in front of me. I always find an excuse to procrastinate again and again. I haven't read a few pages of the book all the year round.

I want to improve my health through exercise, but before I start, I always say, "Today is too tired, let's do it next time." the body is getting worse day by day.

want to end a relationship that consumes you, but it is always difficult to "stop loss in time". As time drags on, you lose more and more.

CEO of Luoji thought once put forward a law, called "the law of recklessness".

means: if you feel that what you want to do is right, then don't always think about achieving the perfect solution before doing it.

it is your own action that defeats pain, and it is always the sentence "wait a minute" that defeats you.

Don't think too much about everything. Start doing it first. Only by going straight ahead can you keep seeing the dawn.

03

Don't be negative

the philosopher Socrates once came across a lovelorn. Seeing him in tears all day long, he kindly enlightened him.

can say a lot of truth, this person is still difficult to let go of past feelings, then complained:

"the grapes you got are lost. If you haven't experienced this regret and loss, how can you know it's sour?"

after listening, Socrates slowly opened his mouth and said:

"if you lose it, you will lose it. If you keep walking, you will see that there are still many delicious grapes. There is no need to worry about this grape that does not belong to you." Go and thank the one who abandoned you and bless her. "

the lovelorn person is very puzzled: "Why should I thank her?"

Socrates smiled and replied, "because she gives you a new chance to find happiness."

A lot of things, from a different point of view, are no longer cloudy, but clear skies.

when you are confused, if you change your mood, you will no longer be caught up in it and will be able to start from scratch.

if a person is too pessimistic, lose confidence in himself and lose enthusiasm for life, it will only make the light farther and farther away from him.

there is no insurmountable problem, there is no insurmountable problem, your state of mind is what your life is.

instead of living in a haze every day, let bygones be bygones and let sunshine live in your life.

from now on, be lenient and learn to be optimistic. No matter what is difficult or difficult, there will be a change for the better.

live happily, all the reluctance and despair will eventually become yesterday without recollection.

04

Don't compare with others

there is a question on Zhihu: "is it reasonable not to let the child lose at the starting line?"

"

A high praise replied: "you have to compare with others all your life, which is the source of life tragedy."

"

how many people are busy all their lives just because they are better off than others.

compare your family background with your classmates when you are young, and your house and car with your colleagues after work.

until the years go by and people reach middle age, they still have to compare their children's success with their relatives and friends.

compare the past and the last. If you win, you will be satisfied; if you lose, you will only increase your resentment.

like Bi Shumin's sentence very much:

"Human life is a chain. There will always be children younger than you and old people older than you. Each of us has our own place, and it is a treasure that no one can plunder."

half of my life has passed. Learn to give up the desire to keep up with others and keep your own happiness with a normal heart.

even if the days are dull, as long as you are content and do your best, you can feel all the good things.

even if you are ordinary, as long as you embrace the ordinary and accept yourself, you can live up to the journey of life.

05

Don't be too demanding

the reason why people live too tired is often because of two words: beg but not.

if you love too much, things will turn out to the extreme; if you want too much, you will lose more.

in a lifetime, the more you want to get the "best" in everything, the easier it is to get nothing.

after getting good tea, I still want to prepare a pot. I look around for a teapot, but ignore the fragrance of tea.

after getting flowers, I want to make a good vase. I worry all day long in order to get the vase, but I miss the most beautiful bloom of flowers.

demanding perfection, it is easy to get into the trap of happiness.

you know, there is no perfect life, only the best state of mind.

as written in the couplet of Lingyin Temple: life can not be more satisfactory, everything is only half satisfactory.

06

Don't set limits

proceed from your potential and never refuse a new attempt.

Shawshank's Redemption says: "Don't forget that everything in this world penetrates high walls, it is in the depths of our hearts."

most of the time, it is not adversity, but your own thinking that bothers you.

the world does not bind a person's pace of running forward. It is his own courage that binds people.

break through cognition, change the perspective of looking at problems, and constantly unlock many possibilities in life.

break through the pattern, when you stand higher, you will see more scenery.

break through the circle, and what kind of people side by side, you will have what kind of life.

never set your own limits and break your shackles in order to usher in the rebirth of a butterfly with a broken cocoon.

07

Don't rely on

with the increase of age in recent years, I feel more and more that it is better to rely on others than to rely on yourself, and it is better to ask for others than to ask for yourself.

have you ever found that if you expect too much from a person, you will have a high dependence in your heart?

in times of crisis, you think he will give you a hand, but the last thing you wait for is to "turn around and go".

when you are sad, you think he will give comfort, but in the end you see "it has nothing to do with me".

the greater the expectation, the greater the disappointment; the more dependence, the more unbearable weight.

MiyazakiHayao has a passage that is quite right:

"Don't rely on a person easily, it will become your habit. When parting comes, what you lose is not someone, but the pillar of your spirit.

learn to walk on your own no matter when and where. It will make you walk more calmly. "

when people come to the end, they rely on self-improvement.

in the second half of life, if you learn to invest in yourself and learn more about the same skill, you will be able to say less to ask for help.

as long as you are strong enough, let the wind and waves rise, sit firmly in the fishing boat.

08

A point is mentioned in "maybe you should talk to someone":

"there is a difference between pain and pain. Feeling pain is not your choice, but persistent pain is your choice."

Internal friction is like having a serious illness, some people choose to be depressed and drag on the "sick body" for the rest of their lives; some choose to end the source of anxiety and regain hope to cure themselves.

from now on, stop internal friction, empty your mind of rubbish, and stop fighting with yourself.