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there are many things in life that make people lose their temper, and the problem of children's education is one of them.

you can often see this complaint in the parent group:

"the most irritable time every day is to watch the children do their homework and be half-hearted!"

"I can't stand it. I still yelled at the child. It's too careless. I have to yell!"

"the child has no ambition at all. He is about to take the mid-term exam and is in no hurry at all."

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it seems that there is something wrong with the child, but if you think about it, isn't it because there is nothing you can do with your child? I'm just using my temper to cover up my helplessness in educating my children.

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Wang Xiaobo once said: "all human suffering is essentially anger at one's own incompetence."

Yes, why lose your temper if you have the ability to solve the problems you encounter?

the higher the level, the worse the temper

Zeng Guofan had a bad temper in his early years. During his tenure in Beijing, he had disputes with many people and offended many people.

he had quarrels with his two fellow villagers, Zheng Xiaoshan and Jinzao, and did some trivial things, but as a result, "hurling abuse was almost like forgetting oneself and relatives."

during his stay in Beijing, Zeng Guofan "liked to have a grudge against people with great names and positions", so that many people dodged when they saw him, let alone dared to eat at the same table.

Zeng Guofan also reflected on himself many times:

"after the discord, I was flagrantly inhumane.

the evil words do not come out of the mouth, and the angry words are not contrary to the body. Do not know this, not to mention others? Keep this in mind as a cautionary tale. "

later, after great enlightenment, Zeng Guofan was almost reborn.

in July of the eighth year of Xianfeng, the Qing court ordered him to re-serve as a soldier in Jiangxi, and his change was surprising.

his good friend Guo Songtao said that he "Zeng Sima came out again, and the committee was quite comprehensive." Hu Linyi said that he was "becoming more and more mature and had no air of regaining the rigid side."

this kind of patience and peace of mind finally led him to the pinnacle of his life.

High-level people are not emotionless, they are just not swayed by emotions, have a calm heart, and show no expression of joy and anger.

they know how to control their emotions and are more responsible for their emotions.

they don't get furious about trifles; they don't complain about difficulties;

punish yourself without other people's mistakes;

Don't influence others with your own unhappiness.

controlling your temper is a great skill

many people mistakenly think that losing temper and anger are the same thing.

but in fact, anger is emotion, tantrum is behavior, expressing anger and losing temper are two concepts.

Psychology believes that anger is one of the four basic emotions that human beings are born with. it is an instinctive reaction that everyone has and can help us protect ourselves from aggression, harm and respect.

so anger itself is a normal emotion and a part of us.

but there are good and bad ways to express our anger.

in the neighborhood square, two children had an argument because they accidentally bumped into each other. One of the children slapped each other, and the child who was slapped cried loudly.

the mother rushed over and pushed the beating child to the ground.

the grandmother of the spanking child was not happy and scolded at the mother of the spanked child, and then the conflict escalated, and the two tore and scuffled together. The neighbors went to a lot of trouble to separate the two.

it was originally a very small thing, because of the bad temper of the two people, in the end, it became inextricable.

Xunzi says: "anger is not enough to seize, but joy is not enough."

losing one's temper is instinctive, but it is an ability to keep one's temper down.

people have a temper. When you feel angry, you should learn to express yourself gently.

count your temper for a few seconds before you lose your temper. What is your purpose in doing this?

is it to solve the problem, or to vent your emotions?

ask yourself again, can you afford the consequences?

if you can't bear the consequences and just to vent your emotions, you can only turn yourself into a joke.

some people say that a person's maturity changes from a temper to a mute state.

immature people are always furious over a trifle.

if you are right, it is easier to explain things calmly and calmly, and there is no need to lose your temper;

if you are wrong, you have no right to lose your temper.

when you encounter a problem, putting aside your useless temper will solve the problem better.

people with abilities have been trying to improve their abilities, not their temper.

people who are incompetent are constantly improving their temper, not their ability.